Supposed to be clubbing right now at Phuture with my girls. Finally back in Singapore for an extended period of time, and I just wanna party with my girls, cause I totally miss them wayyy too much. Also, it’s partly because the house is too quiet, and I’m always home alone. And, well, another part is because my heart’s broken into a million pieces that only dance and music, time and God will heal. For now, I opt for the dance and the music.
Had an awesome night with some of the councillors though, definitely don’t regret it. Definitely glad that I moved on, but made an effort to stay back as well. 29th, no matter who and where they are, will always be my friends for life. If they ever need me, I’ll be there for them. Because they were one of the first few groups of people that I call “family”.
Heart, is finding for something/someone new to focus on. But, nothing much is happening because some things are hard to let go. Even if there wasn’t anything in the first place, even if that feeling wasn’t one of liking. Why so many people think I like him, I don’t understand. But, let them think whatever they want. My heart is breaking for another reason altogether.
I miss America. I miss a Skater. I miss. I miss having him around.
And it doesn’t help that I miss a Singaporean. I miss having him there for me.
Everyone’s left/is leaving me. Everyone that matters.
Well, either that or they find something/someone new.
They say it’s finally time someone take care of me.
But, I’m still taking care of myself.
Doesn’t make a difference.
Or maybe, my heart’s buried too deep inside my defenses.
And no one’s bothering to tear them down because no one cares enough.
Club can’t, and will never be able to handle me. As long as the status quo continues, I’ll believe that only the club can handle whatever sh*te I throw. Sure, that rocker may slowly be creeping into my heart, but nothing will happen until.
Nothing will happen.
Club, shawty gonna burn your dancefloor.